Oh, Baby Don't Hurt Me

What is love?

Is it predestined connection, where for every person there is the ONE other that can complete them, love them entirely and without withholding?

Is it a chemical reaction in your brain, too much dopamine and norepinephren. A large build of up serotonin, a release of vasopressin?

Is it an emotional struggle, built up over time from laughter, tears, fighting, smiling, talking?

No matter what it is, humans are centered around it.

Websites built around finding it, songs written about losing it, sanctified rituals that promote the outward symbolism of it, fights and hate over who is allowed to feel it for whom.

What is important in life? Most of the typical answers revolve around this all consuming notion of love.
Friendship; the neutral love of another human being without sexual passion or romance.
Family; the bond of love between those considered your net, your support. Even to some, the love of someone who shares your blood.
Spouse of significant other; simply said, romantic love.

But why?

Why this ever going search for love, whatever it may be in a technical sense?

Is it because we’re afraid of being alone?
Is it because we have been told for so long that love is the meaning of everything?

Is it the movies, the TV, the music, the stories, the poetry?

What is it?

I think, in my small pocket of introspective wisdom, that when we can answer this question THAT is when we are ready to find the thing most of us strive for.

Love isn’t just the goal; it’s the first thought, the people along the way, the footsteps behind you, and the long stretch of road in front of you.

Love is the journey.

How are you Feeling?

This is a topic I've both wanted and not wanted to talk about. It's an issue that I am passionate about, an issue that can drive my blood to boil. I've literally had shouting matches with my family, whom have an opposing view. These shouting matches are the reason that, despite my deep passion for the topic, I've held off from doing it. The issue is heated, more heated than anything else I've discussed here. People get angry, furious, when you bring this up, and the last thing I want to do is bring trolls to this blog. Strap yourselves in, cause I'm about to talk about Health Care.

But what to say about it? There are so many aspects of this issue, so many things to say. I could talk about the morality, the idea that health is a right, and those who profit off the sick are universally disgusting. I could talk about the quality of health care, the exaggeration of wait times, and the simple idea that waiting is preferable to simply being unable to afford treatment at all. I can discuss the cost of all things, while our country spends billions on military and war efforts. I could even go into the corruption of Insurance Companies, who set up plans intent on keeping you ill and their most grievous slight of preexisting condition clauses.

These are all topics I can write an entire article on, I could rant and rave, I can show my logic and rationale for hours. But in the argument's listed, there is always a counter, counters I personally find weak, but reasonable. There is another, more pressing argument though, that finds this issue at it's most heated. It is the argument that spawns hatred and rage, and it is completely and utterly ridiculous. The idea that Universal Health Care is a Socialistic method, a method that has no place in Capitalism. I just shake my head at this, I wonder how they cannot realize the simple truth?

There's already Socialism in America.

I want you all to think about something for me. Are you over eighteen? Do you have a job? If you answered yes to these questions and don't have any children above the age of five, guess what... You're part of a socialist program. The people who bleat this argument say that it's unfair that they have to pay for everyone's health care, when they can just pay for their own which they consider to be superior. What they don't realize is we already have this system in place for something else... Schools. Public Schools are paid for by the State, the State gains money through the taxes. I have not gone to a School in seven years, and yet I am paying my part for our children to learn.

Now you can go ahead and send your kids to Private School, private schools receive no funding from the state, they're a tuition based system for profit. They're often times considered superior to Public Schools, the fact that you pay them directly means they can afford better equipment, and the limited number of students compared to public means your kids get more attention from the faculty. But your taxes still go to that Public School. You, paying for your own kid's private education are paying for Public School. Are you really going to say you don't want every kid to have access to some form of education? You're going to tell me, that because I can't afford Private School, my child is not allowed to learn?

From the Postal Service to Police we in this country pay through taxes what could easily be privatized and have been. Fed Ex sure beats out the USPS, but I'm sure you're happy the post office is only gonna charge you ten bucks to ship the package that Fed Ex would have charged you forty when you're strapped for cash. And I know you're happy that the cops don't write you up a bill when they've finished investigating a robbery.

The problem with this argument of socialism is that these people believe it's going to corrupt our nation despite the fact that it's been here for decades. They think that as a Capitalist society we can only run on capitalist methods, but it just doesn't work that way. A symbiosis of ideas from many methods of government is the way. It's the very foundation of our nation that it's government would be run by it's people, that we wouldn't be bound by one rule and one system. That we could forge a new system as needed when needed.

I am at heart a Capitalist, as shocking as it might sound, I truly believe that if you have a service you should be able to sell it. But this isn't cell phones or produce we're talking about, this isn't real estate, this isn't big screen TVs, this is life. When you see someone in pain, when you see someone sick, when you see someone at the cusp of death... Are you really gonna ask them cash or credit?

...

Testing the Teacher

There's this issue going around our schools as of late, no it's not test scores, it's not funding, and no it's not teachers with inappropriate relations with their students. This is an issue of payment. The Teacher's Unions have started to sway towards favoring a Merit pay system. A system that rewards Teachers who's classes do well. This issue has only been pushed further with President Obama urging that this system of payment be accepted widely. This of course has sparked a debate, is this a good or bad thing?

When I first heard about this issue, it seemed to me what was being proposed was a Teacher would be paid based on their performance, I.E. their student's grades. This to me seemed a bit... Questionable. What seems to be the actual case is more a reward for teachers that excel, as opposed to punishing those who don't. A bonus for teachers who's students preform well. This seems at first like a great idea. Though it does raise some questions that must be asked.

What definition are we using for excellent performance? Does that mean a certain grade average per class, or per student? Or would it be per assignment, and tests scores as well? The definition of good becomes varied depending on the criteria it is based upon. There is of course the factor of the students themselves, some students will refuse to learn, I remember kids when I was in school who would rather have dental surgery than pay attention in class. What is going to happen to a student like this when a teacher is now getting paid per grade? How can we be sure this system will be introduced fairly, that teacher's won't lower their standards or simply cheat their student's grades to make sure they receive these bonuses?

All these questions come to mind, all these questions are yet unanswered.

But lets think about this... Let's just assume this is implemented in a fair and balanced way, what will this do? Well, it will improve our school systems for one. As teachers continue to strive for the better pay, the student's will be pushed into maintaining higher grades. A new influx of talented teachers will emerge, the ones who can continually gain this extra incentive will survive, while teachers who lack care or motivation for their job will be forced to find better suited employment. This also takes care of our teachers who have been universally under paid for years now, giving them the influx in money they desperately need to keep our current teaching staff employed, as well as give new teachers proper motivation to become teachers at all.

This entire idea is rough, undefined, and jagged around the edges. But you know what? I'm for it if they can polish it down to something that works. This system, if implemented correctly, will simultaneously aide both our educational system, and those working for that system. I can only hope, that if and when this discussion becomes a reality, the kinks and bumps will have been grooved out.

Just makes me wonder why we don't have this kind of system for our Doctors.

Come Fly with Me

In my short time on this planet, I have flown a few times. The experience was, well... Adequate. I got to the airport, grabbed my ticket, trudged through security, and boarded my plane. And while I certainly don't hate the airlines for my personal trips, I do hate them for another reason, I would like to fly more. But the prices for plane tickets are astounding, especially considering the service.

Here you are paying between two hundred and five hundred dollars, three weeks in advanced, for what is in essence an air taxi. A taxi that you don't get to enjoy alone, but must share with several dozen more people. Now I understand, the operation of an air liner is much different than that of a Taxi, so comparing the prices is a bit silly. But here's the thing, the one aspect of air travel that drives me up the wall... A taxi does not increase it's price based on when you call for one. Say I wanted to take a flight in one month, I check the price and it's two hundred dollars, so far no problems. But if I wanted to book that same flight two weeks from now, the price would be much higher... And if I wanted to book the same flight on the day I wanted to leave, the cost would be over double what I would have paid today.

It's completely backwards! An air line makes it's money by booked seats, a plane departing without all or at least most of it's seats filled is not making as much money as it can. The idea is to sell those seats, but here we are at the moment of departure, seats unfilled, and raising the price. It's a cruel little joke on the passengers, they know a person booking a flight on the same day is in crisis, they need to leave on that day, they cannot refuse the hugely inflated price.

You add this with the general disdain of air travel and you can see why companies are falling left and right. Additional charges for luggage, lost luggage, insane security that doesn't make us more secure, cancellation fees, delays, and of course having your flight simply canceled. It may seem like small complaints, air lines can't expect to be perfect, mistakes happen. But think of how much you're paying these people, how much money one trip really costs. With how much we spend to fly, is it too much to ask for better treatment?

I'd just as easily take the occasional mistake if it meant I could afford to fly more often.

Absent

I'm absent minded, I know this, and it's an issue. My mind tends to wander away from the things that are important, and settle upon whatever may tickle my fancy that is not my responsibilities. It makes things difficult sometimes, as I will fully have something planned in my mind, and fifteen minutes later when I intended to do it, my mind has simply drifted onto a new task. It's the reason I come now with ten minutes to produce an article.

Though there are advantages to it... Because my mind tends to drift, I can chain a string of thought a mile long, contemplating and analyzing a variety of things only tangentially related. These loose thoughts become solid ideas, which allows me to produce something without much brainstorming. Being absent minded, and coming to tasks at the zero hour has allowed me to stand the test of time. I work fast, taking those solid ideas and expanding them into a working project amazingly quick. I am able to go from thought, to idea, to product faster than most...

Though these are all excuses, the problem with all of this is that most of the time I simply end up not making it. The zero hour comes and goes without even a passing thought from me, only banging my head when it's brought up too little too late. I hate myself when I end up missing my deadlines, simply because there were no obstacles in my way aside from my own thought process.

I wonder to myself if other people are like me, people who's mind's run at a mile a minute, too fast to focus, too much at once to really rely on one thing. How many people forget dates, deadlines, appointments? How many people forget what they need to do even when they were just telling themselves to put some time aside later to do it? Is my frustration a uniqueness, or is it a common practice?

Don't you wish sometimes your brain would just listen to you?

"I used to say that politics was the second-oldest profession. I have come to know that it bears a gross similarity to the first." -Ronald Reagan

The old wives tale goes as such, that prostitution is the worlds oldest profession. This is a wives tale simply because through simple logic and rational, without money or goods, there is no profit. So the oldest professions had to be farmers, followed by bartering market men, and then maybe prostitution. Then unfortunately someone had to muck it all up by becoming a politician.

Now I'm not gonna beat Ronnie by up here, the man is obviously being poetic. He is placing the concept of politics on par with prostitution, it's quite an astute summation if I do say so myself. What else are politicians than men and women who sell themselves? Men and women who put themselves on the auction block, hoping for top bid. And boy is America buying.

In the past twenty years the electoral process for President has become a circus. Mostly brought on by the media clammering for a story, and a little brought on by politicians trying desperately to get America to care. Many times I've heard the statement that Politicians are becoming more and more celebrities as the coverage of politics becomes more outlandish, and it's completely true.

Look no further than our current Commander in Chief Barack Obama. Moments after his election to office there were already commemorative coins, plates, and DVDs. T-Shirts with his face and slogans can be found anywhere, there is even a Barack Obama action figure. All of his success can be lead to the fact that he sold himself to us so well. A powerful campaign filled with extremely articulate speeches, charm, slogans, and having the knowledge to use media to his advantage.

His objectors hoot and holler about how this is all a sham, acting as if this whole parade of politics is somehow new, it's not. The 1960s held the first Presidential Debate ever broadcast over television, Nixon vs. Kennedy. Those who watched in person felt that Nixon had won the debate hands down, but those watching over television had a different opinion, they felt the charismatic and charming Kennedy had dominated the debate. This is not a new phenomena, the only difference is with the advancement of technology, it's just bigger, louder. The internet and twenty four hour news station allows us to watch the auction block all the time, as opposed to just once every four years.

It's not necessarily bad either, the fact that these men and women know how to sell themselves does not mean their disingenuous, it doesn't mean their issues are lacking. These men and women aren't liars, they aren't cheats, they aren't thieves... They have the issues that all politicians have, they have the same drive and need as the others, they just know how to sell it to us along with themselves. So, they're really prostitutes and barter merchants...

Still amazes me that a quote like that would come from an actor of all people.

The Weather Outside is Frightful

I'm once again going to talk about weather. Though this time, it won't be in a nice introspective metaphor, it won't represent adaptation and resilience. No, this is gonna be a bit more real, and a bit less happy. I'm gonna talk about something that is being debated all over, something that shouldn't really be debated anymore. I'm gonna talk about something that effects every living person on this planet, I'm gonna talk about Climate Change.

Yesterday I checked the weather, as I normally do, to see if it would be necessary to grab a jacket for work. I saw that it was predicted highs in the sixties, lows in the thirties. I'm going to repeat that, for it bears repeating. The weather services were saying that throughout the day it may reach sixty degrees, or go down as low as thirty. That's a thirty degree margin of temperature, let me tell you, thirty degrees is the difference between sitting comfortably in a hammock with a nice book, and freezing your nipples off.

Now I understand, of course, that the weather is never one hundred percent predictable. There are simply too many variables to reliably know what will happen, but a thirty degree margin of error is a rather wide margin of error. Throughout the day the wind howled and chilled the air, it remained at a constant between forty and fifty degrees. It was cold... It was cold at the tail end of April, the middle of Spring. Now today the temperature has pushed seventy all day, all I would like is some consistency.

And this is not a new occurrence, though. For years now the weather has been erratic and strange. Winter not starting till late November, Summers that shift from mild to flesh frying within a daily basis. I've never in my life seen colder Winters and hotter Summers than I have in the past few years. The weather is becoming wild, it's shifting, it's changing...

Whether or not you want to argue if it's Global Warming or not, whether you want to debate on if it's man made or a natural occurrence, something is changing. I don't need the science, the studies, the research, or the arguments to see or feel that the weather is becoming more erratic. I don't need to have the government put together a think tank to get to the bottom of Global Warming. I don't need to see a petition of countries and governments of who think Global Warming is real. I need to see forward movement.

The arguing, the debating, they only go on and on, and they all miss the point. The point isn't on who is right and wrong, it doesn't really matter. The point is that we are doing nothing to prepare, nothing to work on a solution. We bicker on the cause, the result, the name it should be designated, but what people fail to discuss is what needs to be done to adjust to the coming change. Our world leaders are arguing on whether or not a flood is coming, instead of building a boat.

I'm not worried about the flood, I'm worried about the boat.

Weary

We all get tired from time to time, it just happens. We don't mean it but every now and again through over exertion, illness, stress, or even weather change, we become weary. Me, I've been weary for the past five days. One night in the past five I've gotten a full nights rest, and being so tired all week is what caused me to miss my update yesterday. So once again it's time for me to accept punishment... For the next week I will writing articles, three of which will be chosen by Manda, and in my opinion, she's pushing the limit pretty far in this one.

So that's my excuse, I was tired, I had fallen asleep and woke up after the midnight mark. It was a possibility that I'd even miss today's article, as I can feel the drag, the allure of my bed. It's hard, working tired, not just kinda sleepy, exhausted. There is nothing in the world that would make you happier than to put your head down on that pillow, take a breath, and close your eyes. Nothing makes you smile except the thought of feeling that wave of relaxation wash over you as you just let your body shut down. It's so frustrating, so enraging to have to be up... So agonizing to have to keep moving, keep working, keep talking, keep alert. '

But you have to do it. It's not an excuse, not a good one. Tell someone you're tired, you're exhausted, they won't show much sympathy if you have responsibilities due. Keep chugging that cola, keep downing that energy drink, cause you have things to do and nobody cares if you're a little tired. At least, that's the way it feels. Being tired really warps your mood, your perspective. Everything in graining, everything annoys you. You find yourself sneering at friends and family, for doing nothing more than they normally to. But to you, so tired, so wanting of sleep, they're just annoyances that keep you up.

How do you deal with it? Push through. If you absolutely must stay up, that's all you can do. Try and keep the attitude inside, and once you can... get to a bed. It may be hard, the world may suck, and you might want everyone you know to just shut up, but once your head hits that pillow it'll all just wash away. Whatever you do, don't start counting the clock, once you start on a roll the adrenalin will kick in, motor reflexes and muscle memory will carry you through. As long as you don't dwell on how much longer you will be up, how long you have been up, your body will be able to accomplish on it's own what the mind can't. Once you're done, you can reward yourself, can finally just...

Sleep.

Post of... not so much

I am feeling uninspired.

Which is weird, because I am happy. I am excited and thrilled and relaxed and feeling generally good.

So why is is that whenever I set my fingers on the keys, nothing comes out?

It's frustrating, being so happy and full of life and ready and then... BLANK.

Fingers on keys
Don't equal words on the screen.
Isn't it a bitch?


So how do you get inspired? Will's talked about it a lot... but I asked some friends.

Some listen to music. Some put it away and come back to it.

Some just start writing and don't stop until they either pull all their hair or they actually crank out something of substance.



The more I type... the more frustrated I am getting. But... you know... I'm typing. And that's all that matters.

Perhaps though.... you people who read this can give me some suggestions.



Also.

I have noticed, over the course of the past week, that people jump to erroneous conclusions way too easily.
....Stop that. Thanks!

Wednesday..... probably be a rant. I promise it'll be a lot better than this piece of shit.

Work Ethic

I want to expand my last topic a bit, and talk about working some more. I talked about the possible closure of the store I work at, the loss of my job. Now, while I don't wanna lose my job, I also really don't care if this company goes under. I feel no attachment to my work, no desire to see it go on past my own need for a paycheck. This company has done nothing to endear me to them, to make me want to continue working there.

It's not just this company, all stores I've worked with have this problem. The simple fact is that I don't care about this business, so why should I work my hardest? Well, because they pay me is the obvious answer. I don't want to sound greedy, but that's just not enough. Paying someone is only going to ensure they work hard enough not to get fired, without any real connection to their work, there's no real motivation to surpass whats required.

My job now pays me a little more than minimum wage, and only give me two shifts a week. Last year they removed the option for annual raises. I can work my hardest, and it will not effect my paycheck, my reward. I can skirt by with the bare minimum, I can try to excel, in the end I receive the same paycheck.

And this isn't just about money. There's no sense of pride in what I do, I don't have any real sense of satisfaction when completing a task well. I'm just a low level employee, completely replaceable. The company gives me nothing for doing an okay job, and nothing for doing an exemplary job. I feel for this job like I feel for a Doctor's appointment, I don't want to be there but it's necessary, and a doctor will give you sweets afterwards for being a good patient.

If you are reading this and you work in retail, fast food, tech support, or the service industry in general, do you get a sense of satisfaction from your work? I'm not asking if you're happy with your job, I mean the actual work itself, does you feel pride when completing a task, or is it just another check on the list? Does your work job appreciate you, reward you for good work and offer you something for exceptional work? Are you able to have a connection with your job, or is it just a place you go to make money?

Whats your work ethic?